Jeremiah 17:10- “I, the Lord, search the heart, I test the mind, even to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his doings.”
My week had gone by quickly, filled with lots of activity. Doctors’ appointments, lunch with girlfriends, grocery shopping, a visit with Dad.
I told myself that I couldn’t have squeezed anything else in. But that didn’t make me feel any better about not doing the one thing I’d placed at the top of my list: visiting a sick friend.
Yes, I’d sent a card. I’d even called. But I’d been a Christian long enough to know what it felt like to be “nudged” by the Holy Spirit to do more.
And now I was experiencing what it felt like to disappoint Him—again.
You see, it wasn’t the first time I’d put what I wanted to do in front of what I knew He was calling me to do. Like yesterday, when I hadn’t spoken to the homeless woman sitting in front of Walmart. And all the other days when I could have shared the Good News of Christ, but didn’t.
My Sunday school teacher used to quote a Bible verse, “The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” Even before reaching adulthood, I had occasions to experience the meaning of those words.
For as long as I can remember, I have quoted the verse to myself about hearing God tell me I had been a good and faithful servant. The desired to hear God say those words to me encouraged me many times to reach beyond myself and serve God in my community.
But now I was disappointed to find I was putting self first. I knew that didn’t please Him—and it didn’t make me happy either.
I confessed my pride in self and my accomplishments. I asked for forgiveness and for Him to send the Holy Spirit to minister to my heart and lead me in the path he has for me. I’ve prayed for Him to infuse my soul with a love for the scriptures so that I might walk that path with strength and passion.
How are you doing on your journey of putting God first and serving Him with zeal?
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